I’ve been thinking a lot about grief lately. A sweet sixteen-year-old relative of mine passed away suddenly in September. My dog died at the end of October. I lost an election this week. Perhaps the last of the three is of a different, because I, personally, wasn’t running for president. Still, it was a gut punch. Sandberg and Grant in their book “Option B” say that taking these things personally is unavoidable. In grief, the thought that we could have prevented the tragedy haunts us. Healing requires us to step back, accept the randomness of bad luck, and cease playing the blame game. I must stop thinking that there was something that I, or someone else, could have done to tip the election. Sandberg and Grant also say that we must stop imagining that our loss is permanent. Even in the 1930s, when Hitler and Mussolini won elections in their countries, their evil reign was limited. Democracy returned to Germany and Italy in the late 1940s. Mistakes were made, but lessons have been learned. No matter how we feel now, we should not cave to the fear that something unredeemable has happened to our nation. Nor, should grief have such a negative impact upon our personal lives.

Further, we dare not expect the whole world to join us in our grief. Each tragedy is particular, and has its boundaries. In time, no matter how hurt we feel, we must rejoin the human race. Like some gigantic amoeba, life will absorb my personal sorrow and move on. It has other things to attend to.

To this, I want to add one more note, every trouble that comes into this world is a challenge to resolve our grief by doing some act of resistance. I have plan to pray for Ukraine, now that it will no longer have a dependable ally in the White House. I will make a donation to the ACLU, now that justice and civil liberties have an elevated threat level. I will once again adopt a pet in need of a home. Other opportunities for fighting back against the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune are bound to arise. If all of us who voted for Harris and Waltz found some good trouble to be in, this loss would become a victory.